POST 316.

Every damn project I touch screws up.

PP, for example.

Those overly ambitious ideas of mine of getting fabric samples to glue into my book for the designs just messed up everything. So I thought I could just step into some kinda fabric store and there'd be tons of different kinds of fabrics for me to choose from. Chiffons, prints, Satin, Stretch, etc. Afterall, all I need is a tiny piece of each for my sketchbook. 

So my dad suggested Sham Shui Po. I went there, wow tons of textiles, trimmings' shops. Magnificent, I thought. And then the horror started when I got off the car. I found this fantastic leather trimming which I could use and then when I asked for a tiny piece of it, the lady told me, "You need to buy at least a metre. It's $10 for a metre." Silence. A metre *pause*. I only need one effing tiny piece, even 2cm by 2cm would be fine. Then I thought fine, afterall it's just the first store.

I moved on to the other trimming and textile stores and I was told by all of the shopkeepers, the same thing. "You need to buy at least a metre of fabric" or, some even told me, "There's little of this fabric left I can't cut it. You have to take the whole 2 metres of fabric." No kidding, I never expected this to happen. Back up plan? None. Obviously I wasn't going to just go home since I can't get like, a square of sample fabric. Afterall I came all the way out to Sham Shui Po and, walked under that hot sun in black leggings for the whole morning. I do not intend to return home empty handed. 

Furthermore, apparently even with all those different kinds of fabrics out there, I couldn't find what I need. I needed a bright blue satin stretch, grey and salmon red chiffon and black stretch cotton. Then of course there were the prints which I nearly went nuts trying to find. After an hour of trying to get the right fabrics, I moved on to plan B: Buy whatever fabric that looks great and sticks to the colour theme. Get home and sort it out then. I was sick and tired of entering shops, scanning through all the samples and then walking back out. 

Then, I probably made one of the stupidest decisions ever. I just bought whatever fabric that I thought looked great. So I bought this floral stripes black and white print, a grey and salmon red stretch, not exactly chiffon but it was soft and great and drapes. Then I bought this blue satin fabric, turquoise print which looked amazing, then only to realise they actually look like some sofa fabric. I also purchased this lycra black stretch and this hard waterproof kinda liked fabric that was what I initially thought was salmon red only to realise when I got home it was orange. 

So you'd probably have guessed, I returned home with probably 10 metres of fabrics. Some allowed me to get a metre, others just told me I had to get the remaining 2 1/2 metres of fabric which was insane. I mean, the grey stretch chiffon and black lyrca stretch fabrics were enough to make 2 pairs of black leggings and an entire long dress with remains left over. ( And yes I do plan to get my granny to bring it to someone to help sew me 2 pairs of leggings. Of course I'd pass her a sample or my leggings might just end up as baggy stretchy granny PJs. ) 

And then, I was wondering the other day. "Why the eff did I buy so much of this fabric for?" Honestly, the black and white print didn't really turn out to be what I exactly wanted, and the salmon red fabric I bought ( which was actually orange. ) was a terrible material. That's when an immediate thought just flew into my head: I have screwed up my entire project. 

Honestly, I don't even know what exactly am I doing now. Yeah I'm doing some sketches which then I would choose 8 for my final product. But, I flip through the pages and I was thinking, "What the $%&# am I doing?" It's like I'm just sketching out ideas but really I don't really have any goal or whatsoever in what I'm doing. I suppose the right term would be, going along as each day comes, passes. Whatever.

And worst of all, it's due in 3 dang weeks. Well I hereby make it official that I am in pretty deep shit. I don't think even a miracle can save me here.

I hate me and my stupid overly ambitious ideas.